On Your MARKS -Say What Again ?

 

Krishna's mom was making hot steaming dosas even as she held her son's science classwork in one hand asking him "what is earth made up of 75%" ? , as Krishna playfully while eating a cream biscuit replies "water" ! . The exercise continued for the next half an hour and Krishna answered all questions correctly for his science test due tomorrow. His mom, internally relieved and proud that she was being a good mother, went to bed with peace. The test got over and Krishna came home petrified, shaken and crying. His mom, rushing to his side, took him to the bathroom, cleaned him and invoked him why he was in such bad spirits, when he replied  : "Mom, I didnt do the test well today. I didn't know answers to half the question paper". Upon investigation, it was found that the test was for Chapter 2 & 3 , while the preparation during dinner time was only for Chapter 2. Shanthi ( the mother ) angry at him for being so careless, gave him a good earful for being careless, and then once she felt satisfied that she taught him a lesson, drew him closer and pacified him. Experiences like these continued, when Krishna, inevitably and unconsciously inferred a lesson on himself that it was a Great sin to fail, and Failure is Bad. He embraces Fear and is afraid to fail. 

He enters Middle School, when the rotting begins. Syllabus becomes tougher for parents to cope up, the children have to fend off for themselves and every class produces 2-3 bad boys in it (for lack of a better word , ideally no kid should be labelled) , who out of nowhere make poor choices in language, character and attitude. Innocent Sponge characters like Krishna, who even though with good potential, take to be inspired by repeating events, develop a habit or two from these kids. Their undoubting parents, sadly employ the same strategy on their children, oblivious of their kid's evolving age software and newer character viruses. Kids can't and won't tell what they are going through. As parents, they need to be invested 150%, work overtime and read their children so well, to make sure they can be guided gracefully. Beyond an age, old strategies fail abruptly and children tend to make swift movements into different directions. Krishna, this time had scored 3/25, failed in his math test which was being tutored by one Indra miss, very strict and fearful staff. Out of confusion and fear to not earn the wrath of his parents, he hid his test book under a dress shelf and didn't inform them of his marks. Parent teachers meeting comes and Shanthi comes to know off this and Krishna stayed at home, well aware, his butt was going to be toasted in the oven once mom returned. The same thing happened. Krishna, in the next tests, unwilling to put effort to learn the subject better, learns the evil art of copying from his intelligent friend's test note during exam , just like one of the bad boys in the class did and passes the test well with good scores. This rush of excitement of both doing something wrong , and getting good marks, begins to silently make him a liar. He embraces dishonesty . 

He enters high school, and over the years picks up great panache for art, creative skills such as play acting, oratory skills and he discovers how much he comes alive when he was allowed to perform, than go through examinations to show how much he can perform. His parents, who accumulated more ego in the fact that they are wiser by default because they have grown older,  fail to pick up signals from their son's increasing talent towards the Art side. He was performing at an average level, still, due to force of habit, had assumed Good Marks as sign of success. Truth be told, he didn't feel the adrenaline , the rush he got when he was on stage , as compared to getting high marks on a subject. He feels distraught, having been embroiled in a silent mental conundrum. None knew, his key to success. They just thrusted the locks, he had to open, when he had a totally different door to open and walk in. He accumulates feelings of Failure, an impression that he is a dimwit and that he didn't have it in him. Nothing is more pathetic than Unattended talent. 

He jumps over high school, in similar patterns, volunteering for speeches, seminars, plays, essay writings , poster decorations and sketching artworks,  while he was making sure he scored above passing marks to not be branded a Weak student. Little did he know that he was about to enter the dangerous tunnel of "Beta, What are you going to be - Engineer or Doctor or Accountant"? . He hears tons of wisdom from relatives and friends and neighbors, who play the important role of career coaches especially at a time when they shouldn't and end up guilting the child into thinking it was wrong to pursue something that they were naturally good at, which also can be made as a career with some more effort. He embraces "acceptance of circumstances under wrong contexts and gives up his true gifts to fill up his wallets.". 

What are we teaching our children ? To never ever fail ? To always be on the top  , grade wise? To think that extra curricular activities are not career worthy, no matter how good we are at it ? When are we going to learn to unplug from outdated thinking patterns ? If only, the people responsible for a child's schooling days had made better choices,  the world would have seen more passionate talented people, who won from their heart and didn't allow failure to hit their heart. But what happens on a real time scenario ? Just because the neighbor's Lilly bloomed white in color, the seeds that you sowed in the soil had to bring out only white flowers. Any other color is wrong. We need to understand that the word "success" is being redefined by the second and is expanding like the vast universe we are living in. Sex tapes make celebrities. Social services create celebrities. Sports and music, dance and drama, language and numbers, all have potential to touch stardom. Success has become a wall and it can be reached from any angle.  

I am not suggesting, the only way to do something is to excel at it and if you are not a celebrity, you have to jump into the river. I am driving the message that, anyone can pull a rabbit out of their thinking hats if only the hat was allowed to stay with them. If somebody comes and says, you are holding the hat wrongly, you should not hold this hat, your hat is of the wrong color, no magic can help that magician. If we all , each and every one of us, allowed ourselves to live a life true to ourselves, by doing things we were good at, things that made us feel good, competition will not be seen as an external negative risk , but as an internal positive trait. Competition to be better than someone will not be the goal. Competition will be to be hold on to one's own ethics, beliefs, thoughts and talent, no matter how testing the waters around us are. 

If we find some kid, struggling to express what they truly want, let us encourage them to intelligently, gracefully, execute their talents towards achievable goals, in a way, they fulfil their duties towards their parents, nurture their talents and enjoy the life they are given. Let us not snatch any kid's hat, nor set up flag posts for them to chase. That is their decision to make. Let us not force a child into Patterns that don't serve their higher purpose. In this pandemic, when education, way of teaching and learning has abruptly been redefined, let us spend quality time with the kids and children, understand their callings and put that time and effort honestly with full confidence that they will turn out good, instead of making them take the same bus in which we travelled. Arise. Awake.