Faith & Love - The Modern Struggle of Desi Land

 

Disclaimer : Sensitive topic , written with an unbiased mind in the best interests of maintaining peace on the human race as a whole beyond all identities.  

The Unrecognizable Knot of Love

Some of us find peace through Fire. Some through the cross and some through the Lord over the Serpent and some through the unseen superpower.  Some of us don't bother to look at all - the non-believers. The phrase "human race"  has developed such a  distance between each other, that it has become a challenge to give a definition to it without hurting the sentiments of at least one faction. What is even the Human race in today's context?.  Everyone's developing a formula for themselves, identities are multiplying, thanks to the abuse of the homo sapiens in a bid to 'choose for themselves'.  Among this hullabaloo there is a crowd in every place, that yearns for mass peace with a desire to make us see the common thread within all of us, a crowd that keeps hoping that no matter how much disintegration happens in man,  nothing becomes imperious enough to destroy love between each other. Love.  Again,  a word that has morphed so much that it' is being used to convey a strong liking towards both good and bad. Love used to be associated with the simple things in life. These days,  love is thrown out like a pigeon feed to pigeons. Aimless, reckless and without direction. "I love kayaking, I love cooking, I love dancing, I love video games, I love watching horror series... " and so on to a stage, today when some of us shouting slogans like "I love my religion, I Love the followers of my religion only, I love the people of my country only, I love protecting my people". Welcome to today's world where the knot between Love and Religion has fused to such an unrecognizable state that it is hate that binds more than love , all in the name of love.

Can't we not handle Being an Indian?

In a Country like India, a place that generously houses a conglomeration of faiths, languages, races, colors and the like, it is a challenge to sharpen and direct who we choose to love. From callow teens and some semi-grown young adults who misinterpret 'comfortable friendship' to be love and end up hurting each other , to consenting adults we can't really plan who we are going to fall in love with. Let's not even go to the part where some don't spare a thought about anything and bed anyone without a commitment. Everyone has access to every place , with all respect to boundaries established in the name of religion, community, language etc and we can't help but have an exposure to all kinds of people in this country. That being said, there lies a fear among the purists, who feel if they share their timelines with someone 'different', they might lose their identity and that their own chosen/ bestowed Brand of who they are might be at risk.  Some, manage to preserve their identity, and hang out with everyone with ease as their own morals are clear in their mind. They don't get influenced by their audience and they intelligently mix keeping their internal design intact. Then there is a crowd that neither has a well formed internal understanding, nor a maturity to be among different people and make impulsive decisions out of inexperience and for the heck of it. So, are we to blame to live in a place like ours ? Should we blame the Land as a whole for being generous enough to accommodate all of us or should we side with those who want a piece for themselves just to be with their own folks which disturbs the entire house ? Are we intelligent enough to feel Indian at heart?

Does Faith influence Love ?

In a place where preserving family structure is an important ethic, children can't just like that make choices without the yay or nay from their parents. Parents here assume the role of 'Responsibility unto death'  mantra and those who respect the love and dedication of their parents, having lived under their roof can't afford to make choices without due discretion. In extreme cases, there is eloping, after periods of open confrontation and in worst cases there is suicide,  when the choice made is not approved. So,  are we to assume we always need the blessing of the parents giving up our own pull of desire or are we right to cut ourselves off from the Family setup when we select something not compatible with the home team? Is there not a scope for a middle ground? This strong pull done in the name of love by both the children and the parents,  ultimately challenges their existing camaraderie and bombs the aura of the house eventually. Are we to respect the sentiments of the community and faith we are born and never pick a person from a different team , or are we to mix and breed at will without a plan, just because it is fun, exhilarating and dramatic ? 

One needs to investigate, if the fact that loving someone from a different faith makes it more "forbidden" thereby fueling our inner senses to go past boundaries and enjoy the shock ? What in first place influences to declare Love on someone from different faith? Is that even love or a miscalculated vehement display of self will? Let me clarify here, I am not against marrying or loving someone from a different faith. I am trying to draw attention to this selection process. How much thinking we put into choosing who we partner with?  Love leads to marriage, marriage leads to children and children are the future - how do you decide how to culturally guide your children if there are differences on the foundation itself among the couple ? Who among the two is willing to compromise the tenets of their own faith ? Or Are you going to raise a culturally deficit and religiously ambiguous child in this morally corrupted society ?  We can't just select someone without a plan. In our journey towards falling in love with someone from a different faith, both of them have a responsibility to think of the road ahead. The fact that, we live in a desi setup such as ours is proof enough for us to be cognizant of the ramifications of our choices on our families and society from within.  If the couple understand that their relationship maturely morphed transcending their differences, they must choreograph a path to prepare their families and themselves to make their own life peaceful. You can't just pluck an apple from the neighbor's garden and not expect a friction from both your house and the owner of the other garden.  

Some of you might wonder, that in the beginning I told " we can't plan love- it just happens" and here I am professing " Logic before falling in Love" . Let me straighten it out for you.  Love "happens" indeed, but it happens over a period of time. This period of time is when we must be cautious enough to apply our intellect to see if we can keep this going, or gently stem it. It is not overnight, like you just meet a person and Plop! . You fall in love. We exchange words, actions, gifts, we develop memories, somewhere in this journey, we must understand whether the soil on which this Love began to germinate was well layered. We can't expect our parents to explicitly teach us from childhood to not fall in love with someone from a different faith.  It is up to ourselves to understand how to carry ourselves. Living in a country such as ours with so many identity clusters, we can't be aloof in making our choices. So many deaths , done in the name of Love.  This is just wrong, immoral and unacceptable.  At this rate, India can't handle it's increasing demand for harboring everyone's identity interests and we will end up tearing out the country to pieces, which was so meticulously stitched by so many leaders across ages who managed to look past their own differences keeping in mind the Country's overall Welfare.   

Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam - The World is one family

If animals can and still respect the process of mating,  we as humans definitely can make intelligent choices if our ideals are clear.  Respect where you came from, understand your own impulses,  feed your own wants,  but not at the extent of singularly attending only to your own wants. We live in a society where everyone's choice influences everyone.  So, be respectful of the unity among this diversity, be aware of what and how we can mix, do it with grace, but never ever forget the Love that forms the substratum within all of us. We can't afford to be cancerous to our own (human) race. Earth needs us , as much as it needs the flora and the fauna. Let us grow and evolve as a race intelligently and give up all hatred, ignominy, foolishness and simply hold hands with an equipoised mind.